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redheadedfemmeI'm sure some have been wondering how you can call yourself a Christian (or a member of any other "patriarchal" religion) and a feminist.
It seems to me that feminism is in the eye of the beholder. I don't believe you have to subscribe to some rigid tenets (such as the absolute right to an abortion) to call yourself a feminist. I would rather concentrate, not on changing the world, but modifying the views of those around me. If they will accept what I determine to be feminism, and not cross the lines I have set for myself, then I would consider that a victory.
For instance, the issue of headship. Any open-minded reader of the New Testament will see that it sets out a definite hierarchy of authority. This is found at 1 Corinthians 11:3. "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of the Christ is God."
(I'm not saying this to preach to anyone, but rather to demonstrate that Christians aren't pulling it out of thin air. The concept of headship is in the Bible, and if we profess to believe the Bible, we should give serious consideration to what it says.)
So everyone is under authority in one form or another, including the man (or, for my purposes, the husband). This is true even in society in general. There has to be various levels of authority for it to function. In most cases, we don't object to the authority in and of itself, but rather the abuse thereof.
It's important to note, however, that in every instance where headship or subjection is mentioned, it's within the context of marriage. (There are also passages referring to a woman being silent in the congregation, but this doesn't mean a woman can't speak up at all. I certainly do. Rather, it means that from God's standpoint, men and women have different roles in the congregation, and a woman cannot "speak up" if her intention is to usurp the role assigned to men by God.) To me, this boils the formula down to a simple equation.
1. If a woman is married, she has only one head--her husband; and
2. If a woman is unmarried, she has no head at all (aside from God, whose headship would be the same for everyone)
Therefore, it might be better for a woman to remain single for some time, at least until she is out of her teens. That way, you come to know yourself first; you realize what your personal views and standards are, and you know what you will and will not accept in the context of a relationship. This is important later on, when and if you begin to contemplate marriage.
It seems to me that since the wife is to be the one in subjection, then she should be the one to define what that subjection means, and not her husband. One must remember that no Christian has the authority to intrude into someone else's marriage; men and women each have to render an account to God, and they must individually define what for themselves marriage and headship means. In practical terms, this means the wife-to-be should set limits (and all this should be hashed out BEFORE the marriage). For instance, these are some of the limits I would set forth to my future husband.
1. If I want to work after we get married, I will. You will not dictate otherwise.
2. I will decide when and if we have children, and what method of birth control we will use.
3. You will not force me to do anything I don't want to do. We will discuss it rationally like adults and a mutual decision made.
4. If I choose not to work, you will not dictate how much money I have. We will each have a monthly allowance, and purchases over that allowance will be mutually discussed and decided on.
5. Head of the house or not, you do not have the right to be a tyrant.
If my future husband will not accept this, he will be gone. It's as simple as that. This is what feminism means to me, and I will not settle for less. I don't think this is out of line according to Bible standards, and in any case, I am ultimately responsible to God for it.
The main point here is that feminism is the woman's prerogative and duty to define. Nothing in the Bible says otherwise, and if your pastor tries to tell you differently, he is simply wrong.
x-posted to Faith Feminists
It seems to me that feminism is in the eye of the beholder. I don't believe you have to subscribe to some rigid tenets (such as the absolute right to an abortion) to call yourself a feminist. I would rather concentrate, not on changing the world, but modifying the views of those around me. If they will accept what I determine to be feminism, and not cross the lines I have set for myself, then I would consider that a victory.
For instance, the issue of headship. Any open-minded reader of the New Testament will see that it sets out a definite hierarchy of authority. This is found at 1 Corinthians 11:3. "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of the Christ is God."
(I'm not saying this to preach to anyone, but rather to demonstrate that Christians aren't pulling it out of thin air. The concept of headship is in the Bible, and if we profess to believe the Bible, we should give serious consideration to what it says.)
So everyone is under authority in one form or another, including the man (or, for my purposes, the husband). This is true even in society in general. There has to be various levels of authority for it to function. In most cases, we don't object to the authority in and of itself, but rather the abuse thereof.
It's important to note, however, that in every instance where headship or subjection is mentioned, it's within the context of marriage. (There are also passages referring to a woman being silent in the congregation, but this doesn't mean a woman can't speak up at all. I certainly do. Rather, it means that from God's standpoint, men and women have different roles in the congregation, and a woman cannot "speak up" if her intention is to usurp the role assigned to men by God.) To me, this boils the formula down to a simple equation.
1. If a woman is married, she has only one head--her husband; and
2. If a woman is unmarried, she has no head at all (aside from God, whose headship would be the same for everyone)
Therefore, it might be better for a woman to remain single for some time, at least until she is out of her teens. That way, you come to know yourself first; you realize what your personal views and standards are, and you know what you will and will not accept in the context of a relationship. This is important later on, when and if you begin to contemplate marriage.
It seems to me that since the wife is to be the one in subjection, then she should be the one to define what that subjection means, and not her husband. One must remember that no Christian has the authority to intrude into someone else's marriage; men and women each have to render an account to God, and they must individually define what for themselves marriage and headship means. In practical terms, this means the wife-to-be should set limits (and all this should be hashed out BEFORE the marriage). For instance, these are some of the limits I would set forth to my future husband.
1. If I want to work after we get married, I will. You will not dictate otherwise.
2. I will decide when and if we have children, and what method of birth control we will use.
3. You will not force me to do anything I don't want to do. We will discuss it rationally like adults and a mutual decision made.
4. If I choose not to work, you will not dictate how much money I have. We will each have a monthly allowance, and purchases over that allowance will be mutually discussed and decided on.
5. Head of the house or not, you do not have the right to be a tyrant.
If my future husband will not accept this, he will be gone. It's as simple as that. This is what feminism means to me, and I will not settle for less. I don't think this is out of line according to Bible standards, and in any case, I am ultimately responsible to God for it.
The main point here is that feminism is the woman's prerogative and duty to define. Nothing in the Bible says otherwise, and if your pastor tries to tell you differently, he is simply wrong.
x-posted to Faith Feminists
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